creating community: how to get started
photo by paigelaverty.com
creating community:
how to get started
It was past midnight on a cold, late-November evening in New Jersey. I pushed two hospital lounge chairs together to form a makeshift bed. My mom had fallen asleep in the hospital bed next to me--but I knew she would wake up in another 45 minutes to once again ask me: Did the house really burn down? And I would have to remind her, fighting back tears, that it was true. Our home of 15 years had burned to the ground earlier that day. We lost everything in the fire, including some of our beloved pets. My family just barely survived.
So there I was, still trying to wrap my head around something so surreal. I had a laundry list of things that needed to be taken care of the next day. I knew I couldn’t go at it alone, but I also wasn’t sure where to begin. Sitting in the dark, bleary-eyed, with the humming and beeping of hospital machines in the background, I put together a GoFundMe campaign. I put it all out there… every detail of our horrible tragedy followed by a plea for help.
I didn’t sleep that night. Not because my mom kept waking me up. Not because of the hospital humming. Not because of the immense heartache. But because my phone wouldn’t stop pinging with notifications from GoFundMe! Dollars and in-kind donations poured in so frequently that I couldn’t keep up in real-time. We had received so much so quickly that we had to start saying no! The need was met instantly. My family was going to be alright. We started to feel whole again, and it was because our community rallied hard for us.
As the ash settled, I took the time to reach out to those who donated. I wanted to thank everyone individually for their support (cough cough, probably why I ended up making a career out of nonprofit fundraising). I was surprised to see so many names I didn’t recognize, or names I hadn’t spoken in over a decade… like friends from grade school who moved away or my dad’s coworker from the late 80s. How did they hear about this? How did they remember us? Why did they give? I was determined to know. So, I asked. The answers went something like this:
“Loretta, you volunteered to coach my daughter’s cheerleading team many years ago. When she told us what happened, we didn’t hesitate to donate.”
“We heard through some old friends that this happened to your dad. He’s always been the most generous and helpful person when it comes to computers. We’re happy to help.”
“Your mom is an active and selfless member of this church. Please let us know how we can continue to support you.”
“Your brothers have been awesome mentors in our sports community. Everyone on the team and their parents are chipping in.”
“Your family has done a lot for this community in different ways. Of course we’d be there for you when you were in need...”
The short answer? People gave because they remembered my family and I as active and passionate members of our community. This is when I gained a full understanding of what community truly means. It’s not just about having a shared environment or having a common interest--community is about creating a sense of wholeness. It’s about identifying your passion and putting it to use, knowing that it may help fill the needs of others. Its about giving where and when you can in the ways that make sense to you, knowing that the way someone else gives could be your saving grace sometime in the future.
That November changed the way I relate to my community. It inspired me to put community first, so much so that when I relocated to San Diego my top 3 priorities were finding housing, securing a job, and building a community. Years later, I have secured my San Diego community, however, the pandemic is bringing back similar feelings from that cold November night. I’m trying to wrap my head around things that are so surreal… I know I don’t need to go at them alone, but sometimes I’m not sure where to begin.
If you are feeling the same way, then I would empower you to lean into and starting creating your community during these times. Here are 3 ways you can get started:
Identify your purpose & passion: Everyone plays a certain role in their community and that role is, ideally, aligned with who you are and what you believe in (for instance, my role as a cheerleading coach, my mom’s role as a devout church volunteer, etc). All of the ways that you offer community support should come from a passionate place. What are you deeply passionate about? Animals? Books? Get linked up with local nonprofits or community organizations that have a need right now related to your passion. Helping your community feel whole becomes effortless when its aligned with purpose.
Don’t go at it alone: Put your passion to use with a partnership. Who else in your community is passionate and willing to do good, meaningful work? How can you work together and merge efforts? Don’t dive into the trenches alone--that’s a quick trip to burn out. take a good hard look at who keeps inspiring you, and then go ahead and reach out to them. The people who are willing to help and collaborate are closer than you think.
Virtual is a virtue: Yes, zoom burnout is real. Yes, virtual gatherings just aren’t the same. Yes, technology sucks sometimes. AND building your community through virtual platforms is a wonderful option for staying connected. use technology and social media to identify what organizations are in need, or who in your community has a passion project. use these virtual platforms to expand your reach! Your community is no longer limited to your neighborhood--you can explore your passions, fill needs, and give across the globe if you’d really like. Don’t be afraid to get connected from behind the screen… there are many wonderful ways to do so!
If you’re feeling inspired and are looking for a sign for the next step in creating your community--well, here’s your sign. Join me and prana yoga center at the start of 2021 for a virtual Community Vision Board Workshop. this gathering is all about the aforementioned bullet points: identifying your passion and purpose and building a sense of community with other like-minded individuals… all from behind the screen. my friends at prana and I are firm believers in the power of community, and we’re excited to share with you all we’ve learned through the use of vision boards. we are excited to help you see how you can become a more mindful community leader in 2021! Click here to learn more about the event and all the perks that come with it, registration closes on 12/31/2020!
have more questions? get in touch, and let’s talk soon!
- Loretta
