how to cultivate an accountability mindset

how to cultivate an accountability mindset 

when clients come to me with challenges around accountability, they often ask, “do you have any suggestions on what I can do to start being more accountable?”

my answer?: let go of the doing and focus on being and becoming.

embodying accountability and cultivating an accountability mindset first starts with understanding the why. why is becoming more accountable important?

internally, becoming self-accountable helps you build a stronger and healthier relationship with yourself. practicing the (sometimes ego-bruising) skills of self-accountability will:

• encourage you to understand the consequences of your own actions and inactions

• puts you in the active seat of taking action in your life rather than in the passive role of letting life just happen to you (aka, the victim role)

• offer you opportunities to course correct your behavior and habits (aka, call yourself out on your bs), and become an all around, better being.

and when you commit to the personal mastery of self-accountability, that inner work translates outwards and the people around you will start to see you as a trusted, reliable, and responsible person.

here's some more good news: the fundamentals of cultivating an accountability mindset are actually pretty simple. (yay!)

here's some challenging news: simple doesn’t always mean easy. (hmm.)

putting the work into becoming more accountable means getting uncomfortable and vulnerable. it also means getting really honest about your weaknesses, allowing yourself to be wrong, and being open to change. if all of that sounds daunting--remember to bring it back to the why. why is adopting an accountability mindset important? because when it's fully cultivated into your being and accountability becomes one of your non-negotiables, your life changes. things get done. goals get achieved. people want to work with you. new opportunities emerge.

what’s most important on this journey towards accountability is that you start somewhere (and know that you can always restart, again and again). here are a few places where you can begin:

1. study your past: take some time to look in the rearview mirror of your life and call up some vivid memories around accountability. Its important that you call in these memories without judgement, but instead, an open and curious mind. Here are some questions you can ask yourself in that process:

   • who was I when I felt the most accountable?

   • who was I when I felt the least accountable?

   get really detailed when you consider those questions--what/who were you accountable to? what habits were present during those times? what did your day-to-day look like?

2. observe the now: your next steps are observation and self study, which are key elements in behavior change and mindset shifts. consider what you learned about yourself (tendencies, strengths, etc.) after reflecting on your past, and see how much of that is true for you now. i encourage you to try this experiment: pick something to stay accountable to for the next 2 weeks that will improve your life and/or get you closer to realizing your goals (e.g., read 10 pages of a book every day). then, simply observe (and maybe journal) your behaviors, actions, inactions, emotions, and thoughts around staying accountable to that action item. once you’ve collected data around what’s happening in the now, then its time to...

3. get honest: get honest about what happened over those 2 weeks; not so much focusing on if you did or didn’t do what you set out to do, but rather, what story are you telling yourself about why you did or didn’t do it? brene brown states that the opposite of accountability is blame, and blame is simply the discharging of pain and discomfort (cough cough, this is where the process starts to get uncomfortable). some more questions to consider:

   • who or what are you blaming for your shortcomings?

   • did you catch yourself in a lie, or in a “try”?

   • what would it look like for you to take responsibility?

   • what will you do differently next time?

4. keep practicing, give yourself grace: repeat these mindfulness practices above, again and again, starting over as many times as you need to. With every opportunity to practice accountability in a mindful way, the more it becomes intuitive to you. The more you practice, the more you can identity what habits you’d like to strengthen and the ones you’d like to liberate yourself from. remember that getting it wrong and humbling yourself is a part of the journey! give yourself grace, give yourself time, and trust the process.

thanks for reading! share this with a friend, colleague, or loved one who could use an accountability mindset. if you’re reading this and its not yet september 1, 2021, that means you still have an opportunity to sign up for my FREE 21-DAY ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP. if you’ve missed that opportunity and you’d still like to continue the conversation on accountability, or all things mindfulness and leadership, send me a message below!